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September 21st, 2010

An overwhelming sense of nostalgia has washed over me as of late. Memories flash into my consciousness and I feel a longing I cannot quench.

my friend Josh cooks a delish seasonal-veggie dinner for us in my kitchen in CA

I miss my friends, old and new. I miss the feeling of being completely at ease in the presence of another human being – that comfortable space where words are no longer necessary, where we read each other’s body language and just know. I miss walking around Golden Gate Park in San Francisco with a good friend, each of us sharing our love for photography, taking photos of each other and playing with light. I miss happy hour in New York City, laughing and having the best time of my life. I miss taking an afternoon hike in the Oakland (CA) hills after a filling brunch shared with good company. I miss strolling through the East Village / Alphabet City streets of New York, feeling the warm East Coast sunshine on my skin and hearing the familiar sounds of the city. I miss having a girl friend over for the afternoon, laughing, listening to music, taking sexy photographs, drinking wine, and baking strawberry crisp. I miss sharing a glass of wine in my friend’s New York City apartment while revealing devious stories and giggling like teenagers. I miss being a passenger while driving through the streets of New York, whipping through traffic with speed and ease with hip hop blaring through the sound system. I miss taking day trips up to Napa/Sonoma valley with good friends, a delicious picnic lunch in the trunk, good music and excellent conversation filling our ears while we enjoy a gorgeous day of wine tasting.

hanging out in Central Park, NYC with good friends

I miss sitting around the table after a long day of school in Greece, laughing and eating with house mates. I miss getting to know Paris with a new friend, taking bike rides through the city and racing through the Paris city streets. I miss picnics in the park (in Brussels, Paris and Amsterdam) with new friends, enjoying a bottle of wine and sharing exciting travel stories. I miss the art gallery in Amsterdam I would have never found on my own and the excellent company that accompanied that special evening. I miss connecting with new and amazing friends in fresh and incredible cities. I miss those singularly unique moments when I really connect with another human being, that moment where we look in each other’s eyes and time seems to stop – these are exceptional experiences that stand out in my mind and fill me with nostalgia.

Maybe it is the turn of the seasons, the slow change from summer to autumn, which brings about this strong feeling of nostalgia for the warmth of friendship.

Most of all, however, I miss my home. I do not miss the actual physical location of my home; I just miss the home itself. In California, I had a lovely 2-bed/2-bath home all to myself. I love(d) that house! I miss it so much. I miss having friends over, cooking dinners together and sharing wine and mixed drinks. I miss quiet evenings at home curled up on the couch, wrapped in a warm fuzzy blanket, watching a movie and sipping a glass of wine. I miss coming home from work, stripping off my work clothes and curling up in the warm sun-spot on my bed in my underwear, letting the stresses from the day fall away as I enjoyed twenty minutes of peace and quiet. I miss going to farmer’s market every Saturday morning and filling up my ‘fridge with gorgeous seasonal fruits and veggies. I miss cooking dinners in my kitchen. I miss baking – making healthy, organic delicious treats like stone fruit gallettes, pumpkin nut mini-muffins and vegan chocolate cupcakes. I miss taking hot showers in my bathroom and wrapping myself in a thick, warm Egyptian cotton bath sheet afterwards. I miss having my own space, something that is mine and mine alone. I miss my home.

I do not know where my next home will be, but I hope it’s somewhere in Europe. I’m looking forward to all the new memories I am bound to make as my future stretches out before me, all of the beautiful moments I will share with friends old and new, and most of all, I am looking forward to creating a warm, loving space of my own.

3 Responses to “nostalgia”

  1. I really miss you! I miss coming over to eat your yummy food and talk nonsense and important things. I miss that day in Paris we had wine next to the Seine. I miss your aura!

  2. naomi, a beautful soliloquy. we feel the depths of your longing. you mention the 2-bedrm, 2-bath, well, wd yu believe that it has not been rented since you left. we have been flying solo ever since. of course, we gather that you are not implying a return to that particular place although we miss having you as a neighbor. yeah, new york and paris!! they are also high on our list of favorites.

  3. morgan says:

    i look forward to the next time we can listen to good tunes, get tipsy and bare all. maybe by then i’ll have my next tattoo ready for debut…

    i love you and miss you much!

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